Effective Statements

Using I Statements instead of You Statements and owning your feelings can increase understanding and decrease arguments when communicating feelings.

For example:
You Statement: You make me mad.
I Statement: I feel upset when you don't remember to take out the trash.
You Statement: You are so selfish.
I Statement: I feel like my opinions don’t matter to you, when you don’t ask what I think.
You Statement: You never help me around the house.
I Statement:I feel like all the housework resides on my shoulders and I was hoping that you might agree to clean the dishes after dinner when I cook.

Just by taking the time to reword what you are saying can make the other person more responcive and less hostile improving your communication.